self care

When Self Care Leads to Burn Out: My Take on Sustainable Self Care

When Self Care Leads to Burn Out: My Take on Sustainable Self Care

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit “disillusioned” by the term “self care” these days. Of COURSE I believe in taking care of myself - and you taking care of yourself. But I also sense that we’ve been a bit misled at times, mostly by our own selves, to fall into a vicious cycle of ineffective and overdone “self care” that does little to fulfill us long-term, and in fact, can harm us. Allow me to explain, and to assure you I’m doing something about it and want to help YOU change the script too!


I see quite a bit how self care has become a catch-all term for doing sometimes impressive, expensive, grandiose activities in the name of “filling your cup.” Almost as though self care doesn’t “count” unless it’s really obvious, profound, and up to the standards of others. I myself have been tempted to believe that more is better in this area. That spending more time/money/effort on MAXIMIZING self care in big ways is the name of the game. And you know what I’ve learned? Well firstly, there’s NOTHING wrong with going BIG in self care! A spa day? A tropical retreat? Hiring help? Finding yourself the best therapist? Do what you need to do without shame. BUT, the other point I’ve learned is that self care can look like the small, day-to-day, quick little glimpses of joy and contentment in life if you let them and accept them as such. THIS is the sustainable, life-giving type of recharging yourself that adds up in the long run, no matter what life throws at you. Learning to see and create your own opportunities for self care all around you is a lesson in contentment and fulfillment that I think is a necessary one to share with the world. 


The perfect cup of coffee sipped quietly for 30sec. The freshly made bed. The 10min to yourself to read a book you choose. Five seconds of deep breaths in fresh air. The refreshing giggle of a child. Don’t discount these valuable pieces of caring for yourself via appreciation of life’s everyday joys, my friends. 


Because the irony is this: manic and forced self care can quickly turn into BURN OUT


The temptation to do it bigger and better can lead to exhaustion from trying harder and harder. If you are always feeling like you aren’t refueled, the temptation is naturally to try harder; to go bigger. But remaining discontent with your efforts can create a dangerous cycle where you feel as though you need MORE self care to unwind from fulfilling the pressure to self care better (because now I feel like the term “self care” is becoming a verb, obviously HA!). And that’s just not what any of us needs in our lives!


Two solutions that are working in my life right now to help me keep some self care perspective are these:

  1. Jesus. I love Him and I’m not going to deny Him as the source of my self care needs. He fills them, regardless of my own efforts. He works all things for good, and all things He does are in love, and resting in that truth alone is a primary source of self care for me. It’s like a cleansing deep breath. The sigh of relief that feels like it strips the stress from your whole body. I invite you to rest and refuel in the goodness of Christ as well. 


  1. Commit to simplifying the effort. What I mean is, essentially, working smarter not harder. Appreciating and refueling via life’s smallest, simplest moments takes practice. I’ve been working on this myself for years, and continue to grow and evolve my simplest self care practices. I recommend starting off by making a list of the smallest things you can think of that refuel you or feel like self care to you. Bonus points if they’re free too! Commit to adding to that list everyday, at least for a while. 



If you’d like to take it one step further, keep reading…


Part of what I have done to help is I’ve developed a workshop to share what I’ve learned and some hacks to make self care as fulfilling as possible with the least amount of time, money, or energy exerted as possible. It’s called Reset on the Run, as it involves 21 days of micro resets - 5min or less - to “reset” your body, mind, and spirit throughout the day as needed, all while developing these resets into sustainable habits. The strategies work wherever you are, with whatever is going on in your life and health, and are customizable and flexible. Best of all, the program is designed to take your health to the next level with as little time or effort involved as possible! We tackle energy boosting, gut health, mindset, spiritual practices, rest, strategies for all kinds of health hacks, and more! There's also a private group created for support and accountability, and direct access to me and my coaching available to you as well. Plus a surprise or 2 along the way. ;) 


The next round of ROTR actually starts Jan. 11, 2021, and there’s still time to register and grab a few basic supplies you’ll use for the 21 days and beyond. There’s even the chance for you, as a VIP, to get the program for ONLY $1!! Click this link for more info and to register.




If you’d like to connect further and get involved with a holistic healing community, I’d love for you to join my free group HERE.

Meet Adele

 
          Half my lifetime ago I was expecting to be permanently disabled or even dead at a young age unless I found a way back to hope and health. As a result of a mystery illness, I was nearly bed-ridden as a teenager. Sometimes I had to CRAWL up the 7 steps to my bedroom to get to bed because I couldn’t walk that far. I HAD to nap every single day. I was in *constant* burning, aching pain throughout my body and experienced exhaustion and brain fog so bad I could barely communicate. I had quit all sports, babysitting and other jobs. My ambitions, successes, sense of self, and LIFE were slipping through my fingers. I had been misdiagnosed with autoimmune conditions for years only to finally discover that Lyme disease and co-infections were the primary culprit of my medical mysteries. At the time of my diagnosis, I was spiraling into depression, helplessness, and hopelessness.  I had no idea where this journey would take me, but I could not see a light at the end of it, and that was just plain scary.
 
          My mom took me to many doctors, but none specialized in Lyme and tick borne illnesses. They all treated the symptoms I was having as best as they could, but I was still getting slowly worse, or having side effects from medications I was being put on. So my mom and I sought alternative options out of desperation. Homeopathy, diet changes, proper supplements, and rest finally started to lead me into healing and the fog started to lift. During that time, myofascial release from a certified massage therapist was one of the most helpful modalities I tried. She used essential oils too, and that was officially my first introduction to their power. All of these alternative options helped me survive, start to thrive, and begin the next leg of my journey: becoming a nurse. I thrived in a career that combined science, research, and helping others through their suffering and health goals. In my young adult years, I finally had the opportunity to continue my treatment and health journey with a Lyme specialist, which has helped me heal more fully than I ever would have thought possible 10yrs ago. 

          I knew that as I got married, started a family, and was working on healing my body, I had some big goals: 1) to be there for my family and to be able to care for them fully and 2) to have a non-toxic home and life in order to live our best lives. My cousin shared with me some of her journey, which had similarities to my own. She was using some things I was already curious about, including essential oils and specialized supplements. I was HOOKED after the first sample I tried! I could now clearly visualize the next steps of my healing journey - hope had returned!
              
          Now, I have endless hope. I can LIVE LIFE. This is the healthiest I’ve truly been since about age 14 and I’m thriving! I’ve been able to advocate for my own 4 babies, 3 of whom have ended up with Lyme too. I’m dedicated to using my nursing background and love of education in combination with appreciation for functional medicine and alternative therapies to help everyone I can. My hope is renewed. I am empowered and equipped. I’m enjoying and embracing the journey and want to help YOU to be able to have all of that too!

          If you're ready to link arms with me and walk this journey together, please reach out! I'd LOVE to hear from you!


**Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional here to diagnose, treat, cure, or otherwise influence your medical journey outside of the guidance of a medical professional. Please find a doctor you trust and discuss any medical concerns or treatments with them. Also, please know, as an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases through my site at no extra cost to you.

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